Cath's Division 2 Preview (Keep an eye out for your team being previewed)

HIIIIIIIIIII guys.

Now, every year you have some fucking arrogant numpty coming forward and predicting the exact place that each team will finish in. Needless to say, they are always horribly wrong and it's quite pointless.
So the following is a preview of each team highlighting their strengths and weaknesses and how good you should expect them to do. So here is the unbiased preview:


I'll be supporting Ajhax this season because I think they are deadly and will easily win the league.
Well, they would win the league if it went down to commitment but sadly it doesn't boil down to that.
I love each member of this team but their league performances have been quite poor, despite their fledgling performances in friendly matches.
Their new goalkeeper, TT, will allow Cam to play in his original position, forward. TT is a very genuine guy who looks quite impressive in goals, but does carry a few mistakes and can perform shoddy passing. He is new and will certainly gain experience which will lessen the chances of errors. They have great versatility as Cam could fill in, if TT was to miss a game.
Tanzim is the captain and has certainly drilled the right attitude into this team. He is devote and on the pitch is strong, especially at the walls.
The Gruffalo is an extremely solid players, especially with his angles and has very good positioning. He has a great mentality but has been rather unfortunate in his last few friendlies, with his defensive positioning. That may be a worry but on attack, there is no worries as he proved in Season 1 when he scored quite a few for the Leftovers. I've always seen him a solid forward with great positioning.
As if they didn't have good enough depth already with those 4, they also have Joehan who has improved so much in the last 2 weeks. His finishing has become sharp and he knows what to do.
Cam is quite impressive outside the league games but was very poor in the league last season, compared to their friendlies. He is an impressive GK but it looks like he will be play forward this season, where he is also very good, just less influential. He's quite easy to fool with the juke, but aren't all forwards?
I'm going to be honest. This team does not have the individual prowess that others have, but with a strict set of tactics, they could compete for promotion but they have to get their league performances right so promotion could be a long way ahead.

Action Men One to Watch Out For: T Tommy (TT)


Bayern Neverlosin narrowly missed out on promotion last season but that certainly doesn’t mean that they will be a shoe in this season. Their captain, Kun Aguero, is quite a likeable guy but he seems to be very very relaxed which may go against his side as there seems to be a lack of practical preparation, compared to other sides.
There seems to be a noticeable lack of activity in this team as Locke seems to be losing activity, while Iggy, XL and Momo aren’t seen too often.
Locke has been jittery in the past and doesn’t seem to have the best reputation on the pitch. He has his solid moments but has had his moments of madness and will need to up his activity to lessen these errors.
Kun is a very strong player, in my opinion at least. I feel he is certainly able to play at Division 1 standard so, for his own good, he should really be seeking to play for a Division 1 side next season, and he will hope that it is his own team.
Iggy is far from the most active on the site, but from my memory, was decent last season. He is a solid player but a team need to know how to play with each other and that is useless if your only bonding time is when it counts.
Momo has been around quite a bit recently and once again, we have quite a solid player but once again, a player who will struggle to be a major influence for the club.
XL is another one of their new draft picks and Kun will be hoping that he can turn up for as many games as possible. To be honest, I can’t tell the difference between XL, X and X-Master so I’m not bullshit, haven’t a fucking clue who he is. He’s foreign...so that must mean he’s flairy.
I’ll be honest, I think we have a nice guy as captain here who will be frustrated this season but most likely won’t vocally show it. They need a massive step up from other players especially Locke, who can provide a lot of mental strength to the side.

Bayern Neverlosing One to Watch Out For: Kun Aguero


"Oh dear God!"

These were the thoughts of every single member of the Feed Me Community when Rachel was announced as a captain. Will it work? We shall see. Personally, I feel that this is great. She is committed, she loves playing and she's mentally strong. This is her 6th or 7th team now but hopefully her last.
On the pitch, she has proved that her best position is midfield where she focuses and excels at covering the goalkeeper, but she does tend to lose the run of herself at times. A lot of what has effected her is that when she has made a mistake, she has been dropped and not given much of a chance. Now, if she keeps herself on the pitch, despite a mistake, she could prove quite a solid player this season.
All of us who have been here from the early days know Ace. I feel this man has been over-hyped due to his long absence and return but he is quite a solid forward, but don't expect him to dominate the league. He will perform well for the team but there are a lot of question marks over his availability.
Fergy was a surprise pick last season by Circle's Boys but he has been finding his way of late. He's a quite humble guy and I'm sure his relationship with Rachel will be great. He plays a similar role to Rachel so it will be tough for him to get a lot of game time, but I speak on behalf of all of the site when I wish him the best for the season, as he hopes to prove himself and carry on from his decent form last season.
J. Mata was quite a backroom figure for NWA last season, due to the fact his activity dropped but he seems to have returned now and is quite happy with Rach. This is great because one loud voice in the team with Rach, and there is trouble. But Rachel has picked quite genuine persons to aid her team this season.
Lastly is Echsehh. He is very active in the German leagues and is a strong 'keeper so if he turns up and Rachel/Fergy can provide that great cover with Ace/Mata up front, I can see this team aiming high.
Likewise, if activity stalls them, I can see them finish very low. They have a good team but need to sustain the activity until the season ends.
And Rachel will no doubt be a colourful character again this season!

Aquopolis One to Watch Out For: Echsehh


Last season, what an absolute disaster for TI Sparta! They didn't win one league game and their only win came in a meaningless cup match!
Shockboy started off the team and it eventually led to Ovo taking over, and a spat occurring. Shockboy was then dropped at the end of the season and that's the end of him. Was it a mistake? We shall see.
Replacing Shocky in goal will come down to X-Master and Mick.
X-Master is an impressive Dutch player who shone in the Cup of Nations as the starting 'keeper ahead of Suarez. His activity will be worrying though as all the Dutch seem to be conceding that they won't make every game. When he's there, I can see him being an influential figure, as long as he doesn't lose his cool and discipline.
Mick can step up in his absence, but is also capable of covering him in midfield. Mick will be hoping to bounce back after embarrassing events in Season 2. He is quite a solid player and appears to make mistakes less than others.
Their captain, Ovo, has improved plentiful since his arrival to the site but I feel his defence would be better if it wasn't put to test. I learnt in 1v1s that he is tricky to defend against so I would back his attack this season, but he seems to lose his concentration when it comes down to defence. Will he have the balls to start himself with all the depth in his side?
Crib$ introduced himself to FM in an unpopular manor. He's a cocky man but he showed signs last season of being a very promising player. He has excelled in the 365 league so if he reproduces that here, Ovo's team can certainly be major contenders to win the league. On paper, it would be disappointing if they failed to achieve promotion.
Lastly is TehBeast, who has also impressed a lot in the Nations Cup. He provides even more attacking flair to the team, along with Crib$ and Ovo. It will be a huge fight to nail down a starting place in this team. TehBeast is one of the more genuine Dutch on the site so he will provide a lot of leadership to this team, along with Ovo.

TI Sparta One to Watch Out For: Crib$



Mad couldn’t decide whether to allow Constantinople to become the final captain or Brary. Ultimately, he came to the decision to make Constantinople the manager and Brary the captain of this new club. To be honest, it’s pretty stupid. One of them should just agree to leave the club to the other and try their luck another time.
Constantinople won’t be playing, as he is a manager and fears for his life if he plays. He won’t be mentioned again as his name is a pain in the arse to type.
Brary is the captain. He is quite an impressive player but he loses his concentration quite a lot and strays off into stupid positions. He will have to cop in the league in that sense and stick to his passing which has probably been the best aspect of his game. It’s obvious that he likes to focus on it. It will be a pleasure for his team-mates to play with him this season, but there will be moments of frustration for them too.
Blaaaa is next into the spotlight and I have no problems talking about him. I play with him a lot in German Haxball and I must say, he is probably the best player in Division 2. He is very strong and early signs have showed that he enjoys and has mastered playing with Brary as they are ripping up opponents very well. This guy has a lot of quality and really shouldn’t be playing in Division 2, considering he is at the peak of German Haxball. He will be a big player though.
Amigo is the first ever Icelandic in the Feed Me League and it is great to have him here. He is a solid goalkeeper but I’ve never seen it as his best position. He is very composed on the ball and most of the time he finds a great pass. He’s a safe player but I wouldn’t put him in goal, despite the fact he loves to play there. He can be just as useful outfield as Brary has another goalkeeper to choose from.
That goalkeeper is Shockboy. I was going to draft Shocky before opting for Vargo instead, as I decided in the last moments to be a bit less risky. This is Shockboy’s season to shine and I sure hope that he starts for HK Flamengo. He has improved a lot since the final stages of Season 2 as I’ve noticed that his angles have vastly improved, which is a big part of a goalkeeper’s game. His corner play has always been the best part of his game so that is a big strength that they will have if he plays. This is Shocky’s chance.
Last and certainly least, is Donny. He’s shit.
I have higher hopes for HK Flamengo than I do with most of the other Division 2 teams. I can see them contending for promotion this season or at least certainly for a play-off spot. Blaaaa will be important and they have great depth in defence. To be honest, they have great depth everywhere which can prove vital. It’s up to the management and captaincy to get them as high as they can.
And of course I was just taking the piss about Donny. Donny is quite a solid player who does lack the flair and magic that other players have, but he is a great addition for any squad. Midfield is his position and I feel after watching his brief spell between the posts before that he can be successful at covering whoever is in goal. He will have a tough fight against Brary and Blaaaa though for a place in the starting line-up.

HK Flamengo One to Watch Out For: BLaaaa




This team really do have to be the favourites and I am certainly not alone in thinking that. Out of all the captains themselves, I think Cheese would probably be considered the best player, and because he is a ‘keeper, easily the most influential to the team’s performance.
Much like Chef’s in Division 2 last season, C#NTS automatically have a great foundation with Cheese at the back and his activity is certainly not in doubt. His quietness may be a negative though as teams around him would be doing more training than his side as of yet.
Cheese provides great solidarity at the back and with the right cover; they could have a very strong defensive record at the end of the season.
And who better to provide cover than V-11? This man has proved himself for two seasons now but has certainly taken a step backwards in his career by stepping down to the Division 2. Anyways, he has worked with great ‘keepers such as Circleboy and Chef, where he has proved how good he is. There is no reason why himself and Cheese will not be just as much of a success. I even tried to sign him over the break but it is best he gets regular playing time rather than be in the specs on a lot of occasions.
Fr1sky is a player who I am not too familiar with but I do know that he was on the radar of a few clubs in the draft. His activity will be key in that event to spur the team onwards.
So who can attack for the team? X is a brilliant forward who will be torturous to the Division 2 defences this season. His finishing is sublime and he is certainly going to be a surprise package. He majorly impressed in the Nations Cup with the Netherlands and now it’s time for him to do that in the Division 2.
C. Ronaldo is another Dutch player who seems to have a very fine reputation with my colleagues in Germany. Once again, he is a player that we have seen very little of in FM but we hope to get a good idea of him in the next few weeks.
On paper, I would say that C#NTS and TI Sparta have the stronger teams in this division, but with players like Cheese and V-11 who have already proved themselves at the peak of FM, I believe that they are favourites to win the Division 2 this season, and I would be extremely shocked, along with many other people on FM, if they were not promoted.

C#NTS One to Watch Out For: X


Seedstitch have been set up by a guy I truly love on TS and who is very likable on the site, Edgar Wallace.
Well, I did love him before he fucking picked Booba. I had planned on picking Booba but Edgar has grabbed himself a real gem. Booba is a solid German player and his best aspect by miles is his attacking corner players. He is extremely sharp there and certainly gets a 20/20 from me. He has caught myself out on occasions and I still need to get used to it. Luckily I won't be playing him this season and I am on his team in Germany. He is a great player!
Edgar, himself, is very solid and can play anywhere on the pitch to a reasonable quality. He has a smart attitude when it comes to the game. At his best, he can be really really solid defensively but over the course of the season, do expect some sloppy moments.
The rest of their players are relatively new to the FM spotlight so it is very hard for me to make a judgement on them.
My initial impression of Fapallday was that he was a total ball chaser and quite poor but this was several months ago and I assume Edgar knew what he was doing when he picked him.
Fred is Belgium. His foreign status instantly makes him flairy lol. He seems active and he has been quite solid whenever I have seen him play.
SergioBiscuits is a 'keeper and may start for them there this season. He is a decent player but may not be as commanding as others. We shall see as this player is new to me.
JackHutchy has a round face and quite a bit of hair. He plays for his local football club with Edgar, where they have green jerseys sponsored by Nike. He's not even on the fucking team.
Overall, I think they have an unpredictable team with some unheard of players but if they have a solid goalkeeper, I think they can compete for promotion, especially with Booba up front!

SeedStitch One to Watch Out For: Booba


Lé Poppy Créw... I don't know where to start about this team. I really can't foresee any success whatsoever. Poppy absolutely made a cock up of his 1st draft pick when he picked Rolex. Immediately, he pleaded with an admin to let him pick again, but that was never going to be allowed.
Rolex is quite a poor player with an absolute shambles of an attitude. We heard him on TS and he sounded pretty middle-class and genuine, then he just goes to chat and calls people "cnts" and leaves out 2 letters from every fucking world. Even if he was the best on the site on the pitch, I would not have him on my team.
Gremlin is a little less hectic but I'm not too sure of his playing abilities. Can not remember being in a room with him once so I can't say too much on him. He likes to talk too.
PLIK has announced that he has lost interest and that he is leaving at the end of the season so I can't imagine him sticking around for long, especially as this team should struggle to win games from the off. With losing, becomes more lack of interest.
Smiley's striking ability will really be tested this season as he no longer has proven players around him. Will he score as much this season? Unless it's 3v2, I really don't think so.
Lastly, Poppydan, a player who I do actually rate. I'd prefer to see him in goal as he is strong there, but he is decent elsewhere too. I also question his ability to last the season as he has been giving story after story about leaving the league for various reasons, and now that he is coincidentally able to play again, if his team starts losing, he will easily leave I feel.
I don't predict much success for this team and I think it would be a massive achievement to finish outside the bottom three.

Lé Poppy Créw One to Watch Out For: Their 1st signing from the free agency

Get our name right Cath

y u no bump fag.

6 up now

Class Preview Cath, Think you were a bit sarcastic on a few (me) lol

Good work though

TehBeast isn't the player to watch out for? D;

Well wrote though, really interesting to read.
Good job.

UPDATED

DONE

This is good, Cathalio.

Anyone planning to do a predictions/preview thing for Division I?

Really fair reviews and I agree with them all except Poppy Crew. They're going to be the dark horses this season. People instantly assume they suck because the guys on the forums piss about but they are a very solid team.

I disagree with a lot of cath's opinions, although that probably means that cath is spot on

socrates wrote:I disagree with a lot of cath's opinions

So do i - that TT is shite in goal, and Rolex I think is coming on well as a keeper - though I do agree with the point about the language R

Tommy T wrote:

socrates wrote:I disagree with a lot of cath's opinions

So do i - that TT is shite in goal, and Rolex I think is coming on well as a keeper - though I do agree with the point about the language R

From now on TT i'll give you a bitchslap for every time you call yourself shit or say when its not your bad

Joehan wrote:

Tommy T wrote:

socrates wrote:I disagree with a lot of cath's opinions

So do i - that TT is shite in goal, and Rolex I think is coming on well as a keeper - though I do agree with the point about the language R

From now on TT i'll give you a bitchslap for every time you call yourself shit or say when its not your bad

I bet I played some part in this

Constantinople wrote:

I bet I played some part in this

I believe your name was mentioned once or twice, yes - we make too many mistakes between us C

Tommy T wrote:

Constantinople wrote:

I bet I played some part in this

I believe your name was mentioned once or twice, yes - we make too many mistakes between us C

No you both just take the blame for other peoples mistakes

CathFag wrote:and leaves out 2 letters from every fucking world

As opposed to adding letters

Tommy T wrote:

Constantinople wrote:

I bet I played some part in this

I believe your name was mentioned once or twice, yes - we make too many mistakes between us C

This is true TT, but I will saay that you are the better keeper TT.

Where's the Div 1 preview?

Adarax wrote:Where's the Div 1 preview?

Who cares about div1.

Fergy wrote:

Adarax wrote:Where's the Div 1 preview?

Who cares about div1.

^this

div 1 can wait until after we're promoted